Steve Jobs at the Pearly Gates?

The New Yorker magazine has this clever cover of Steve Jobs being checked by St. Peter not in the physical Book of Life, but on an I-pad. (Although, as my friend Ilene Vick notes, he was a Buddhist.)

This reminds me of one of my favorite nerd jokes. The story is that Bill Gates died and was met by at the entrance to heaven. St. Peter said, "Bill, we are just not sure what to do with you. On one hand, your software brought the computer to so many people for their enjoyment. On the other hand, it was buggy and crashed a lot, causing people to take God's name in vain."

He went on, "Here's what we are going to do. You are going to spend two weeks in hell and then two weeks in heaven. At the end of that time, you will get to choose where you will spend eternity." Bill thought that sounded like a good plan and was immediately transported to hell.

Upon arrival, he was amazed. White sandy beaches stretched as far as the eye could see. Every day was bathed in beautiful sunshine. The beaches were filled with hot women in bikinis. There was ample beer and a party going 24/7. "I'm not sure how heaven is going to top this," he thought.

After two weeks, Bill was transported to heaven. This was a beautiful, marvelous place that his mind found difficult to grasp. It was calm and peaceful and filled with wonder. After a few days, however, it began to feel a little...well, dull. Nothing was happening to stimulate his senses as had been the case in hell.

At the end of the second fortnight, St. Peter summoned Bill and asked him, "Which will it be?" Gates answered, "Heaven is a wonderful place, but I think I would prefer hell." "As you wish," St. Peter declared and Bill Gates was transported away.

After some time had passed, St. Peter made a visit to Bill Gates in hell to find him in torment in the flames. Gates cried, "This is awful. Where are the sandy beaches? Where are the girls and the beer? This isn't what I signed up for." Whereupon Peter replied, "Oh, that was the beta version. This is the final release."